Thursday, June 12, 2008 began like any other ordinary day; unfortunately, it didn’t continue that way... As I look down at my wrist to the pink and black bracelet resting there, I am reminded just how quickly things happen. Sometimes one small decision, a mindless choice, really, can alter your life forever. You see, dying changes everything…
My husband John and I met for lunch that day; as we waited, his phone rang. He stepped outside to take the call…I assumed it was because of bad reception. It was actually because John couldn’t understand the caller; it was Brian’s friend, trying to tell us our 17-year old son had been in an accident…he was unconscious and bleeding, somewhere in Pineville… Exactly one week earlier, almost to the minute, we had finally given Brian his car…a light blue 2000 Honda Civic; exactly three weeks earlier, he got his full driver’s license.
From the moment John received that telephone call at 11:51 a.m., our life became a waking nightmare. Brian gained his freedom and control with those car keys, and now he was in serious trouble… The greatest fear of every parent was now our reality; he was injured and alone. We were overly aggressive and reckless driving there, desperate to reach him and afraid of what we would find when we did. Brian was taken by ambulance to the closest hospital, and then flown by helicopter to CMC’s main trauma center. In less than two hours, it was all over… The words of the surgeon and the look on his face are burned into my heart and soul... “I’m sorry; your son didn’t make it. He died.” Brian never regained consciousness from the moment of impact; there were no goodbyes. Life as we knew it was over… Our entire family died that day; we are no longer the people we were.
It took many months of grieving before we were able to acknowledge a very simple truth. Our beloved son and brother, Brian, lost his life due to a series of seemingly inconsequential decisions that many of us take for granted daily. This horrific chain of events began with a distraction, one that is quite common in our City and beyond. Brian looked down at his cell phone to make a call. He looked up and followed his friend’s truck across oncoming traffic, never looking to the left. His car was struck in the driver’s door by a truck; the force of the collision spun his car around and it was hit again by a second truck in almost the exact same location on the passenger side.
This journey through the valley of shadows and sorrow is difficult and never ending; we struggle every day to be strong and carry on without him. In an effort to bring some good from his loss, we decided to give away 2,500 pink and black silicone bracelets in exchange for a simple pledge: at least on June 12, in memory of Brian, don’t use cell phones while driving. Pink was Brian’s favorite color, and he loved to wear calf-high black socks while playing golf or wearing sandals.
This trivial token in swirled pink and black is an instant message of a different sort… Our greatest hope is that through sharing Brian’s story, someone will make the wiser choice and ignore their cell phone while driving. If it saves at least one life and another family is spared the pain that is our constant companion, then Brian’s death will not have been in vain. The fact of the matter is this…there is no telephone call or text message that is so important that it cannot wait until you get where you are going or until you can at least pull safely off the road to decide.
Please, please, don’t lose your life over the press of a button. ‘Remember Brian 06-12-08’
With hope,
Tammy Garlock
rememberbrian@mindspring.com
My husband John and I met for lunch that day; as we waited, his phone rang. He stepped outside to take the call…I assumed it was because of bad reception. It was actually because John couldn’t understand the caller; it was Brian’s friend, trying to tell us our 17-year old son had been in an accident…he was unconscious and bleeding, somewhere in Pineville… Exactly one week earlier, almost to the minute, we had finally given Brian his car…a light blue 2000 Honda Civic; exactly three weeks earlier, he got his full driver’s license.
From the moment John received that telephone call at 11:51 a.m., our life became a waking nightmare. Brian gained his freedom and control with those car keys, and now he was in serious trouble… The greatest fear of every parent was now our reality; he was injured and alone. We were overly aggressive and reckless driving there, desperate to reach him and afraid of what we would find when we did. Brian was taken by ambulance to the closest hospital, and then flown by helicopter to CMC’s main trauma center. In less than two hours, it was all over… The words of the surgeon and the look on his face are burned into my heart and soul... “I’m sorry; your son didn’t make it. He died.” Brian never regained consciousness from the moment of impact; there were no goodbyes. Life as we knew it was over… Our entire family died that day; we are no longer the people we were.
It took many months of grieving before we were able to acknowledge a very simple truth. Our beloved son and brother, Brian, lost his life due to a series of seemingly inconsequential decisions that many of us take for granted daily. This horrific chain of events began with a distraction, one that is quite common in our City and beyond. Brian looked down at his cell phone to make a call. He looked up and followed his friend’s truck across oncoming traffic, never looking to the left. His car was struck in the driver’s door by a truck; the force of the collision spun his car around and it was hit again by a second truck in almost the exact same location on the passenger side.
This journey through the valley of shadows and sorrow is difficult and never ending; we struggle every day to be strong and carry on without him. In an effort to bring some good from his loss, we decided to give away 2,500 pink and black silicone bracelets in exchange for a simple pledge: at least on June 12, in memory of Brian, don’t use cell phones while driving. Pink was Brian’s favorite color, and he loved to wear calf-high black socks while playing golf or wearing sandals.
This trivial token in swirled pink and black is an instant message of a different sort… Our greatest hope is that through sharing Brian’s story, someone will make the wiser choice and ignore their cell phone while driving. If it saves at least one life and another family is spared the pain that is our constant companion, then Brian’s death will not have been in vain. The fact of the matter is this…there is no telephone call or text message that is so important that it cannot wait until you get where you are going or until you can at least pull safely off the road to decide.
Please, please, don’t lose your life over the press of a button. ‘Remember Brian 06-12-08’
With hope,
Tammy Garlock
rememberbrian@mindspring.com
Hi. You came to my school today & spoke. I'm a Senior & have had my license for a year. First of all, I wanted to say I’m so sorry about your family's loss. I also want to thank you for sharing your story with us today. & I know it must be hard to 1. Have gone through what you did & have lost your son Brian, & 2. To speak & tell people about it. It takes strength to do that-& You are very strong. You have so many good points on this blog & in your story. & I think it's wonderful that you are able to tell your story to teenagers and inform them of things they need to know. I hope that many of the kids today & in the past & in the future, when they hear your story & the others, take it to heart & really listen to it & understand. I hope they realize all of the dangers in so many things such as driving, drinking, & drugs and apply it to their life & use it for the good. If could really make a difference & because of you someone may see that. Hopefully many people will benefit from it & make smarter decisions for their life. I hope they take it seriously & really think about these things. We all, as people, take SO many things for granted & never think of the things that can happen going day by day like nothing can happen-But really-anything can happen-We just don‘t realize it. May we all use your story & really think about things & try to work on not taking things for granted. You’ve open my eyes more & reminded to not take things for granted and this bracelet will serve as a reminder. I also like the idea of the bracelets. I took 3, 1 for myself & gave the other 2 to other people & had some people read your story. Your story has been very helpful & I just wanted to let you know. Everything happens for a reason & continue telling your story, making a difference, & helping someone else by informing others of your story. Everyone can get something from it-we all could use this story as a life lesson. With your story I will try to be even more cautious as a driver. I just wanted to let you know what I thought. :) <3
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